Depression

http://www.changeisgood.org/depression_resentment.htm
Depression.  It sucks.  Like a naughty little monkey, it calls out to you and annoys the psyche...saying things that aren't true, but makes you wonder...maybe they are true.  Maybe you really are that fucked up.
     But, you're not really.  You ARE a good person.  A good person that suffers from a few diseases.  Terminal, chronic, debilitating.  Drag myself here, drag myself there....as I feel overwhelmed and unable and disabled and!!!  It's TOO MUCH!
Who wants someone that is this fucked up?  I feel unlovable and then am told it's because I don't love.  But, I do love.  As much as I can, anyway.  Am I not enough?  Don't I deserve to be happy by now?  Why am I not?  Because I do not have control of my own life.  I gave away my power a long time ago and now I don't even know where to look for it.  +Joyce Meyer Ministries says on her calender for January, I must have a positive attitude and then I have power over my circumstances.  I don't know if I can do that.